Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Dorm room done and decorated, almost and Sweating to success.

Dorm room done and decorated, almost and Sweating to success.


I spent my first night back in my dorm room last night. When I arrived in my room after class yesterday, I was greeted by big full boxes and stacks of full plastic bags. I had a lot of unpacking and decorating to do. I started working on my room at around 3:30pm yesterday and finished at about 10:00pm. I say finished, however it is not quite done yet. I still have quite a bit of posters to hang around my side of the room. The room still feels empty if I don't have my personal touches painted on the walls. I won't feel like it's "My room" until I get it all done. Once I complete it, I plan on taking some photos of my room for everyone's viewing pleasure! So look for that coming soon! :)


School has been pretty busy the last couple of days. Today was only the fifth day, but I have had so much homework to do in those last five days. There should be a law against giving students homework the first week back to school! In fact, tonight's blog will be cut a little short due to World History homework! But I wanted to update and let you guys know what is going on! Hopefully I will get to post a longer blog and award my blog awards to the lucky 15 in the next few days.


My World History class has been the hardest class I have had yet. It's not that it is difficult. It is the professor has a different way of teaching. He doesn't just make us buy a big heavy text book and make us take notes. OHHH NOOO. That would be WAYYY too easy right! At least I think so. Actually in reality his teaching style is probably the easiest one out there. We read from the History book at home, and then all we do in class is discuss what we read. He calls on us at random and we are to explain to him what we thought the reading meant and give the readings importance. Doesn't sound hard at all, right? It is difficult to me because I don't like being called on. When I am called on in class and expected to give a correct answer...I feel like the WHOLE WORLD is just staring at me. I begin to feel very uncomfortable. I begin to feel like they are staring at me because of my weight, and not because they are all expecting an answer to the professors question. I start to feel very awkward in my own skin. I begin to sweat and sudder. I have determined it is soley because of my weight. When people stare at me like that, it automactically triggers in my brain that they are looking at me with disgust because of the way I look. That's how I felt the first day of World History. However, Monday was different. I had thought it over, and I informed myself that the only reason I felt like that the first day was because of my lack of confidence in myself and the way I look. The first day he had called on me. I didn't know what to say. My palms were sweaty and I could feel the stare of what seemed like everyone in the room. Monday like I said was different though. This Monday I walked into that classroom actually hoping he would call on me. Hoping he would single me out for an answer. But he didn't, but next time he does...I will be READY! Tomorrow I have World History, before I go to bed tonight I need to read from my book, and be completely ready to take on a question.


Sadly, I have not yet been back to the Wellness Center. However, I will be going to workout there tomorrow night. My next blog post I will fill you in on that, and it will be good. :) I'm eating right though, following my calories to a T I am very happy to report! I need to find a location to weight in at. I think I can at the health clinic here in town, but I want to check with them to make sure it's alright, which I will do very soon.


Thank you to everyone who supports me. Your kind and supportive comments really give me that extra boost I need to stay focused. You don't know how much that means to me.




REMEMBER: TOUGH COOKIES DON'T CRUMBLE



-Amber


Some BEFORE and "IN PROGRESS PICTURES"

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Around my heaviest.

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Mom, Courtney, and me. All of us at our heaviest. Before I left for college last year.

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My Graduation party (2008). I wasn't so happy on that day. I felt so ugly in my gown.

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Fat face graduation day.

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In progress, SUMMER!

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Sissy and me in progress.

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In progress, SUMMER!

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Family In Progress! Before I left this summer!

14 comments:

  1. I love talking in class- maybe because I can't shut up in general. I guess I enjoy the challenge of putting how I feel/or what I know in my head- into words. Also I enjoy feeling like I am smart. Anyway...

    You don't have to worry about people judging you on your weight when YOU are the one with the fantastic grades...!

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  2. I still hate it when I am called on to answer a question. Even when I know the answer, my mind blanks out - I hate that!

    Woo-hoo for the New Amber who wants to be heard in class!

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  3. I love ot baby!!!! TOUGH COOKIES DONT CRUMBLE!!!! I have missed you so very much!! Cant wait to see how you amberized your room, I bet it is the coolest there by far....you are so very special!! I cannot wait to see you baby I will have that whole weekend off!!!!

    Sorry about how he teaches but maybe you need him to teach this way...You are beautiful baby so know it and your skin will catch up to your brains way of thinking, you are doing good!!

    GET YOUR CHARGER BACK so you can charge your phone and call your momma....lol
    really need to hear my babies voice love you so much ambee girl...SOOOOO very proud of you!!
    love always and forever, gobs and gobs, lots and lots forever and always....xoxoxoxo
    Momma girl

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  4. Baby! I can't wait to see your room in person! I bet it rocks, because that's just you. You completely rock!
    Lift your head high sweety---you're on a road that will take your confidence to new highs---and the idea that you can accomplish anything in the world is no longer something that makes you roll your eyes, instead, it makes you ponder what you want. It's all there for the taking. You just have to take it!!!

    I missed you in the Y tonight---I miss you all the time. I'm so proud of you!

    Can't wait to see you over the Labor Day weekend!!!
    With tender loving wishes for everything to go your way baby,
    Love dad

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  5. Great pics! I love 'em.

    Sometimes I feel like a tough cookie but I've been dunked in milk and now I'm all soggy...

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  6. Wow, you have been a busy gal, haven't you? I remember how uncomfortable that it felt to be called on in class, but as you lose the weight and your confidence levels continue to rise, it will become easier.
    I hope you get to the health center soon and get your weigh ins scheduled. Its always nice to see the numbers go down when you know you are working hard.
    Your pictures are just incredible. You should be so proud of yourself!

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  7. Great blog! I am glad I found it. Good luck in your weight loss journey! I will be adding you to my blog roll!

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  8. I glad you your getting settled in now, best of luck to you in your classes! Trust me, we understand how crazy your schedule must be...don't feel like you have to write a novel each day. As long as you are posting something each day, you will find that it will help you stay accountable. Your pics are amazing and show how far you have come! If I didn't see the before pics, I would never had known you were over weight. Great job!

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  9. I truly hate being the focus of a group of people. I had to talk in front of a couple of groups this year and honestly i could feel my whole body shaking.
    Love the saying :)

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  10. That's so fabulous that you now have the confidence to want to be called on in class! I totally feel your pain at not really feeling settled until everything's all set up.

    Good luck with homework, posters, and getting back to the wellness center! You can do it!

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  11. I remember those days so well. Everyone else in your class (I guarantee it) feels the same way you do. Even people we think have it all together struggle with self-image. Hope you have a great year--you are off to a good start! Incredible photos!

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  12. Those pics are awesome!! I'm hoping to start posting some soon....at least recent ones. I don't know if I have the courage to post my heaviest weight ones,lol. I'm a weight loss wimp. :)

    Glad you're settling into your dorm and I'm SO thrilled for you that you're staying in your calorie limits...that takes a lot of focus...so good for you girl! :)

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  13. Amber….. I love the new look, it is so cool,
    I was going to ask if you were going to post pics of your room, so glad you are.

    You know what …I hate being called on ….BUT you got into Uni cause you are smart, be confident, and he is asking what YOU feel about the text…Not what HE thinks about the text, so as long as you have read the text then your interpretation is not wrong, just that your interpretation…believe in yourself sweetie….If you knew everything and everything that Prof knows then there would be no need to be at Uni eh?

    I am glad that you are ready to share your opinion…World history I would be hopeless at ….. I cant even tell you what happened to me yesterday lol

    Heaven’s above look at you in those progress shots…Fantastic sweetie
    Man haven’t I prattled on ….guess being out of action thru stress I am making up for it now…
    Take care sweetie and remember how special you are


    www.kathiejourney.com

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